If no, then you can say, “Well, I hope you feel better. In the meantime, could you please take your stuff upstairs?” If he sasses, you respond again with kindness: “I’m sorry you’re not feeling well, but we still have to follow the house rules. Please pick up your stuff and take it to your room. Then I’d love to know if there’s anything I can do to help.” Read more
Archive for Children
02
Jan 2012
Things You Can Do Right Now Part (3)
29
Dec 2011
Things You Can Do Right Now Part (2)
• Practice banishing your negative thoughts and language and focusing on what you desire for your stepfamily. For instance, when I was annoyed and hurt that the kids didn’t like the meal I cooked, instead of giving in to the negative thoughts, I could have decided in the moment not to think them. Read more
25
Dec 2011
Things You Can Do Right Now
It can be awfully hard to think of positive things if you’re mired in anger, self-pity, fear, or any of the emotions on the negative side of the spectrum. So I’ll give you a few examples to get you started.
• Do loving things for yourself. Get a massage. Have lunch with your best friend. Go for a walk. Take a yoga class. Check out the new exhibit at your local museum. Listen to beautiful music. Read more
21
Dec 2011
What You Expect Is What You Get Part (4)
First, the kids complained, which, as every parent and stepparent knows, they all do. Second, I got mad. Third, my husband became supersensitive to my mood and got angry at the kids. Fourth, the kids picked up on the bad vibes and acted out even more, which put us back where we started, because I got mad again. Read more
17
Dec 2011
What You Expect Is What You Get Part (3)
Start with the thought that you and he are partners, and you’ll be able to have more productive discussions that end with a positive action. Maybe he insists that the children always say please and thank you when they ask you for something. Or maybe he tells them not to interrupt you when you’re talking. I’ll give you an example. Read more